I was born and raised in Evansville, IN by a single mother. I have two half-siblings, an older brother Steve and younger sister Siara. I am a father of two lovely boys named Joseph and Isaiah. I am divorced twice. On March 4th, 2001, I enlisted in the United States Army in Louisville, KY as an enlisted Tanker 19K. During almost 15 years in the Army, I held 3 MOS's 19K, 19D, and 18C. During the Special Forces Qualification Course, already MOS qualified, I decided to pull myself out before graduation claiming myself as a liability. I was a liability due to the PTS(D) onset. I never regret what I have gone through and experienced during my time in the Army and I wouldn't trade that time for any other in the world. The experiences have made me a stronger person all around.
When I started my entry into this book, I was reluctant to participate. I received a phone call from a friend that told me that we lost another brother to suicide. It's crazy how someone can be here one minute and gone the next. I was upset, but that was all the confirmation that I needed to put my words on paper. No soldier likes to make himself vulnerable to other people, so we don't talk. We are trained to shove the shit down and continue the mission. The stories in this book are a privilege to read because there are doctors that are trying to get service members to open up and after lengthy treatments, we still won't do it. Some are way more vulnerable than I was. You can see it as you read. I hope that some find peace in knowing that you aren't alone in this fight. We lose too many good men and women because they think there is no way out.
Today I live outside of Cleveland, Ohio where I am writing a sequel to this story. I travel from Indiana to Ohio, then on to Maine. My two sons live in two different places. I am required to be in another at times. I am also a proud supporter and alumni of Save A Warrior (SAW). I believe the program and all the men in the organization play a vital role in the suicide epidemic that we face. With the proper knowledge and tools, we can save us from ourselves.
I would like to dedicate my entry to every family that has lost a soldier in this battle.